Transgender Artist Model Michael Emery
Transgender Artist Model
22 years experince as a life drawing model
" A wanta be Transsexual "
" female-roled/receptive male "
This is a Web Journal
The content is intended for educational, research and journaling purposes .
Much of the content is in Scenario Form
thus whether fact or fiction, is by interpretation.
If only; "How things could of turned out dilemma"
"Like a thought experiment of sorts"
or
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"Like a Actor preparing for a script in order to be convincing"
"A Study and Outline for a Fiction Novel"
" As much as Life Drawing can express Reality, it can express Fantasy "
NSFW
contains nudity and sexual content
established
FEBRUARY 19th, 2020
Modeling nude for Artists
Since 1997
I made up this label soon after beginning to pose as I was at the time trying to get in with as many schools,study groups and individual artists as possible. Making the title "A male figure nude ", the word use of figure was very important, as yes, I have the the "figure " of a male, yet psychologically much more female like, and very much female like in sexual orientation, due to fact I am only attracted to straight/heterosexual men.
This is when I began wondering how would I word it for Transgender Artist Model ?...still a dilemma !
And if I did have the surgery to have my penis replaced with a female like "vulva "....I most likely could not title it " A male figure nude "...?
I've spent alot of time in settings such as above portrays
As a Artist model, it's One's Duty to be on time!, be professional, be able to generally,. hold 5. then 10, then 20 minute poses steadly. Might sound easy, yet holding a standing 20 minute pose can push the limits in discomfort,even for a simply pose as shown below
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The Model is there for the Artist to See in a Way a Artist must see to even be able to draw well. Away that could be described as very Meditative, away where one is seeing the subject with out "pre-concieved judgements, simply truly seeing the subject before them as it is. The Artist must see unhindered by their own or society's ideologies of the world. I think most Artist's would agree, at least while drawing,one is in a different state of mind, some call it drawing from the Right side of the Brain
I do believe if We lose the Meditative Practice of drawing, creating all types o Art for it's meditative value, society will lose it's Mind slowly.
Drawing for a sketch artist is as like drumming is for a drummer, and one must practice as often as possible to be good at it. And a Meditative time to pay Attention in a different way.
I like how he starts talking to class;
" You must un-learn to re-learn" then over come your Ego, this is why most people can't draw, they are " pre-concieved ,which is held by ego.
I have dreamed of modeling for Art classes after " GRS " surgery and dreaming of looking similar to above .
I always considered myself a Third-gender type (female sexually roled male / very feminine male),thus have always desired to have a female like vagina / vulva as a penis doesn't fit my identity as I am not interested in performing in a male role.
I very much feel psycho-sexually female.
I was drawn to nude modeling for artist's in large part because I've always loved to draw,along with wanting to be around people socially with the same interest.
Because my sexual orientation is primarily female-roled/receptive zoosexual, my social life was being with my animal partners by 1986 I was living with and was the female receptive partner for 3 small jack donkeys and 4 large intact male dogs, I had been a *exclusive female-receptive zoosexual since 1975. (*no human partners)
So I needed a social life with human beings instead of constantly being with my
animal companions, so posing nude for Art life-drawing classes was a very good social event for me to be involved in.
After I did start posing 1997, I found it to have a great meditation value for me, it was inspiring to be around so many talented people, by 1999 I was modeling routinely for 5 different colleges and a few art study groups, as well as individual artists and photographers.
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- The life drawing studio is a good safe place for me to be nude and accepted -
Though it wasn't publicly known that I was a homosexual/transgender, as well as a "wanta be transsexual", (although because as I posed for a class, I could often hear students whispering and the phrase " Michael is homosexual/gay, " I heard often).
At least in part, I started posing for social reasons, I'd become very isolated socially since my male lovers had been my male animal partners for 21 years
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Because I am psychologically sexually inverted,
"I've always dreamed of having a vulva instead of a penis"
Always dreamed of posing looking like photos here
I've always wished I could pose for Artists wearing my "cage" because it helps express my role identity as a 100% female receptive partner for males.
"I consider my psychologically emasculated"
I started wearing a "cage" soon after I started performing for human males in 1997
I think posing nude helped me express myself in a way that is taboo, helping me gain self confidence, as I was not only that I'd been living secretly as a "wanta be transsexual", but had been living secretly as a female-receptive partner for jack donkeys and large intact male dogs my entire life.
